Sanctuary

You are

A peace and a flame

You steady and stir me

All at once

----------------------------

Those words could not have been more accurate for how he made me feel, and even better, he felt the same way too. He was my safe haven, and my anger. He drove me more insane than I thought possible, but just being near him brought me tranquility. It was perfect. He was perfect. So I wanted to believe his words. I wanted to believe that everything he was saying was truthful, with no ill intentions hidden beneath the surface. His emotionless expression always faded with his words and yet, to say I was weary of his words would be an understatement. He was like a flame, beautiful to watch, yet the closer you get, the more unstable he becomes until he consumes me completely. But as beautiful and comforting as the fire is, it can only destroy, and I began to question whether I was consumed by the idea of being infuatuated, or if I actually was.

The walls he tore down were now rebuilt, laid on the foundation of his hurtful words and distant behavior. But a part of me will always be pulled to him. But is it worth being hurt by him over and over? To be questioning how he feels about me? To spend the nights alone, wondering if what we had was even real?